


Tragedy of Independence

by CelestialKey



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Family, Independence, Separations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-19
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-03-18 16:17:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3575841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CelestialKey/pseuds/CelestialKey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ireland finally gets her independence from England, but to get it she had to give up something she loved more than anything else in the world. This is set just after she signs the Irish declaration of independence.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Tears trickle down my cheeks as I watch him take away my, our son. Had my independence really been worth this? Had all this fighting been worth losing the one person I cherished above all else? As I stood there questioning why everything had to come to this a cheer rose up from my people. Never in my long life had I ever anticipated this. Sure Arthur and I hated each other but we understood each other and at times deeply respected each other. But this, stealing away my son in exchange for the one thing I wanted more in the entire world, this was the final straw. We could never see eye to eye again, we were enemies. 

As my friends gathered around me to shake my hand and to celebrate our new found freedom I could still feel my sons warmth lingering in my arms, I could still smell him and feel his little breaths on my neck. Reaching up to touch the place on my chest were he always lay his head when I held him I could feel dampness. Had he been crying? Did he know that it was probably the last time we would see each other for a very long time? Did he know his father was now stealing him away just to spite me? I struggled to keep up with my thoughts when suddenly blackness.

* * *

I awoke in an unfamiliar room. It was large, dimly lit and very well furnished. A nurse sat on the chair beside my bed but she had drifted off to sleep. I slowly crept out of the large four poster bed and made my way to the window to find out I was in Arthurs' old Dublin mansion. People were celebrating in the gardens outside and fireworks were going off everywhere. I was so captivated by this that I failed to notice someone enter the room. 

"Beautiful, isn't it?" a charming French voice whispered in my ear.

Starting I jumped around grabbing the nearest object I could find to hit the intruder with.

"Wait stop! C'est moi!" he shouted.

My eyes widened in surprise as I recognised who it was. Francis. Without thinking I threw myself into his arms and broke down into tears. Unable to hold myself upright anymore, I let my entire weight fall on him as my body convulsed with sobs and he slowly moved to sit us on the floor. I don't know how long we stayed like that but he refused to let me go until I had stopped crying, regardless of how much I hit him and vented my fury into his arms.

"Are you alright now mon petit fleur?" he asked when I fell silent.

"Why did he have to take him?" I croaked, my voice hoarse from crying. Francis remained silent for a while, slowly breathing trying to find an answer.

"I do not know", he eventually replied. Pushing myself free I tried to stand up and leave the room, but instead my legs gave way and I fell hard on the wooden floor. I tried again to lift myself to my feet but my legs had lost all strength and I was forced to stay lying on the cold floor. Francis watched me for a few seconds no doubt pitying me before he got up and then lifted me into his arms and carried me over to the bed. It was then that I noticed the nurse was gone.

"The nurse that was here, where did she go?" I whispered, my voice still harsh and it hurt too much to talk. 

"Nurse?" Francis replied sounding slightly shocked "There wasn't a nurse in here with you."

"There was one, she was sleeping on that ch-chair once I woke up. Sh- she was wearing a white uniform and had bl- blonde hair", I stammered. I knew that I was in shock but there was no way I could have been delusional. Francis looked at me worriedly and put his hand to my forehead and looked straight in my eyes to check if I was sick. "Get off me", I grumbled "I might have been through a lot today but I am not insane or sick, I know what I saw!"

He then moved away, sitting on the side of the bed. He shuffled slightly and kept watching me carefully, piercing me with his icy blue eyes. "If you say she was there, then I will believe you. But you must know you have been unconscious for a week now and yes, your people did have a doctor check your health a few times. Once I got here however I sent him away as we both know human doctors cannot help us." He stated. "Can you tell me what she looked like then? In better detail of course." He continued, waiting for an answer.

I closed my eyes trying to recollect exactly what she looked like. My memories were fuzzy and the image of her kept flickering in my mind, constantly shifting appearance and making it hard for me to pin down one detail about her apart from her uniform and hair.

"She had blonde hair" I started "and wore a white uniform, I think she had loads of freckles or she was very tanned. I can't really remember too well. She had darker eyebrows though, that I do remember and I think there was something else odd about them but I can't quite place my finger on it. Oh and she was skinny, or maybe just a little plump. Why can't I remember who was sitting there on that chair once I woke up?" I sighed defeated. How could my memory fail me at such a time? Was I too stressed or did I need more rest? I put my head in my hands and leaned forward on the bed, trying desperately to remember the nurse, but the more I tried the more she seemed to fade from my mind.

Suddenly a crash from outside the door broke the silence. Agitated, Francis marched across the room and threw the door open to find two men lying on the floor in fits of giggles. "Sor-sror-sorry to make sho mush noishe" one of them slurred, using the door frame he moved himself off his friend and propped himself upright. Still swaying slightly on his feet, he looked down on his friend and burst out laughing claiming that he was king of alcohol and his friend has to buy him drinks from now on.

"James ya gobshite, what maksh you think you are king of drink?" his friend whined.

"Cause I'm.. I'm still standing Sean!" he remarked victoriously.

"Oh aye you are, but only cause that door is there" James answered making his way to his feet, "move away from that now and see how long it takes till ya fall flat on yer arse". It was like watching a toddler on ice, both men stood watching the ground very carefully, trying not to fall whilst also trying to make the other fall.

This continued for a while until Francis cleared his throat and they both suddenly became aware of our presence. "Now if you don't mind mes amies, can you kindly leave now or I will have to call someone to get rid of you. As you can see the lady needs to rest." He informed them gesturing towards me. 

They stared dumbfounded at him for a minute before realising what he had said and then turned their heads in my direction, they caught my gaze for a few seconds before Francis grabbed them by the arms and dragged them down the hall.

"Ma'am we're sorry for the dishruption", came a shout from further down the hall which was swiftly followed by a loud thump and an ouch. This was quickly followed by a lot of shouting and a group of guards running down to the door and apologising for letting the drunks past them. They looked terrified and I tried to hide a smirk as they whimpered when Francis returned and then closed the door after him.

"Do I have to ask what you did to them?" I asked teasingly, suddenly feeling a little better. He hit me with his best puppy eyes and pout and simply claimed he did what was needed for my safety. 

"Now where were we before those 'men' interupted?" he continued, pausing "Oui, we were discussing the nurse who was in here."

I sighed as I once again tried and failed to gather my thoughts on the nurse, "I'm not sure anymore... I think maybe it was the stress of this independence? Maybe I just dreamt I saw a nurse?" I answered, secretly hoping this was the case, but deep down I knew something was blocking her from my memories.

"Well, if that is what you think then there is not much we can do, is there?" Francis smiled encouragingly at me, "but, it does worry me that there were no guards on this corridor for a while. You must now organise your men otherwise Arthur will try and take you for his own again, and I cannot let that happen." He stared at me, his eyes full of rage, determination and longing.

My breath hitched in my chest at this, I stared at him for a few moments completely taken aback by how much one look had affected me. Under Arthurs rule I was essentially kept under house arrest since the famine as he feared what I would do once I was given the chance. He was right to in the end, for as soon as he turned his back I had found enough power and courage to start a revolution and force him to give me independence. But even with all the hurt he had caused me I couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if he had given me enough space to see that my people had what they needed. Would we have come to a mutual agreement and not end up hating each other, but now I was the same as Alfred to him; a traitor and someone who stabbed him in the back. This thought hurt me so much that I had to fight back the tears that were threatening to start again. A sudden hand on my shoulder forced me out of my daze and I looked up to see Francis sitting very close to me and looking straight into my emerald eyes with his crystal blue ones. He looked worried and pulled me into a hug.

"It's ok to cry, I know how much he hurt you and I will help you get over this," he whispered softly into my ear as he pulled away, once again holding my gaze. He smiled softly at me, making my heart jump slightly. Regardless of his words however I felt that I had cried enough over a man who had driven me to insanity, starvation and back. I had fought in so many wars thanks to him and made many enemies who I wished were friends. Blinking back the tears I tried to focus my thoughts on the future and how I could become a new nation with good connections and remove myself from fighting forever.

"Francis," I started uncertainly "I think I have cried enough over him. I think I want to start making a new life for my people and make more allies who will actually help me and not abandon me when I need them. I want to stand strong and be proud and defend others from nations like Arthur. I want.. I want to stand on my own and see everyone who I had to abandon again. I want to see Alfred, Christian* and Matthew. I want to talk to Alistair* and not have to worry about Arthur getting jealous. I just want to... I just want to be someone who makes everyone who helped me proud. I want to make you proud because you helped me so much." 

I felt myself smiling as I said those words, for the first time in a long time I felt like I was finally myself and I could become a nation worth all the trouble everyone went through. Francis instantly pulled me into another hug and when I tried to pull away he refused to let me go. We stayed like that for a while until he eventually pulled away and kissed me on the forehead.

"That is the Fianna* I know, now use that fire to build a nation that will stand strong against your opponents. Or I might have to claim you for myself." He added teasingly with a wink before turning towards the door. "You might want to rest more now as I am sure the next few weeks will be exhausting," he called as he closed the door behind him. Leaving me alone to contemplate on the future that lay ahead of me. I smiled as I pulled the blankets around me and drifted off into a dreamless sleep free from all the worries that had plagued me before. The nurse completely forgotten.

A woman left the mansion sometime after dawn, she had snuck out through the staff entrance and was staying to the shadows. Ignoring the pouring rain she walked out onto the street and made her way towards the docks. If anyone looked at her they could have sworn she was happy to be walking in the rain as her face was fixed into a huge smile, but her eyes were red and the rain hid the tears that fell mercilessly from her eyes. She turned a corner and disappeared, replaced by a man with startling green eyes, bushy eyebrows and crippled by pain. A man ripped apart once again by someone who he hated to love but did nonetheless.

* * *

*Christian = Australia

*Alistair = Scotland

*Fianna, pronounced Fee-ina. The name of a legendary group of Celtic warriors led by Fionn Mac Cumhail, in which both men and women fought side by side. They are among the most famous figures from Celtic mythology. It's not a common Irish name for girls, but given Ireland's history and how I think it is a pretty name for a girl I think it fits.

This is based just after Ireland got Independence and I wanted to do a story with my own Ireland and how she reacted to getting Northern Ireland taken away (who the baby is at the start).

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

I paced up and down the hallway of the large English country manor as I waited impatiently for the doors the hallway led too to open. My mind raced through a muddled rainbow of emotions, doubt racking my brain and forcing me to consider leaving. I was in the enemy's territory and chances were that it was a trap set up to capture me again. But there was something about the phone call yesterday that made me stay, that made me think that Alistair was serious.

_ Flashback _

I had thrown myself into my work after gaining my independence desperately trying to keep myself distracted from the aching pain in my heart. I was a whirlwind of emotions for those few weeks. One minute I would be jumping for joy and celebrating with the rest of my people, the next I was crumpled in a corner as I remembered what was taken away. It was like a huge chunk of my heart had been ripped out, and now I had to pick up the pieces without knowing what I had truly lost yet always knowing that a piece would be missing. In those moments of darkness I let my mind drift to thoughts concerning my son and how he was being treated now that his father and uncles were finally pulled into the war. Was he alone? Was he scared? Was he healthy, happy or was he suffering as I was? Most importantly I regretted the fact I had to give him up and I regretted the future I could never give him. I wanted to teach him how to walk, how to talk, dance, and so much more. I wondered how Arthur would raise him; I wanted to give him the world if I could. But that was impossible now; I had denied all rights to give him anything, secretly I wished that maybe one day Arthur would allow me to spend time with him, to allow me to be his mother. Then in the midst of all these dark thoughts and questions my mind would always find the one question that haunted my dreams and ripped my soul apart, will he know who I am? This one question scared me more than anything else in this world and it was one I could never answer. I could only hope Arthur would do the right thing and tell him about me, not twist the truth into something convenient for him to use. Deep down I knew that it wasn't going to happen, my son will never know me and it hurt.

"Ring, ring, ring," The phone broke me from my trail of thought and I noticed the paper I was writing was covered in tears. Shaking myself I got up to answer it.

"Fianna? Is that you?" came a rough Scottish accent down the phone.

My heart stopped at hearing that familiar voice, "An...Alistair why, what I mean... Why are you calling me?" I stuttered and gasped for breath. A hoarse laugh greeted me down the line and was broken up by a sudden fit of coughing, "Alistair are you alright?" I asked hesitantly.

"Well I'd be lying if I said I was fine now wouldn't I lass? No I'm not in the best shape if I'm honest," he admitted.

"What happened? You never tell anyone when you're hurt," I rushed, I imagined every worst case scenario happening to my friend. I was met with silence which worried me, "Alistair please, just tell me. You're my oldest friend and even though we aren't supposed to talk I don't want to see you hurt." My plea fell on deaf ears as I heard a cough and few things being moved around a room until Alistair decided to talk again.

"Lass I need ye to come over tomorrow, Arthur isn't here and trust me you will want to be here." He stated in a matter of fact voice. "I will send a boat over now if you accept the offer, but it means you leave tonight. I have already arranged a place for you to stay because I know you will come."

I stared at the phone for a few seconds as I processed my thoughts, Alistair was telling me to go to Arthurs, to my former captors' home. This is crazy I thought, my heart was hammering in my chest and I started to panic, did Arthur want to take me back? Was my independence a lie? Had I fought for nothing?

"Trust me Arthur has nothing to do with this, but if you don't come you won't get another chance. Both he and Wales are fighting and that leaves me alone in his country manor near Blackpool," Alistair tried to reassure me of his honesty and convince me to say yes.

"Do you promise he won't be there?" I mumbled and closed my eyes, this was crazy. Anything could happen but I couldn't help but trust my oldest friend and it had to be important as he would never sacrifice his friends.

"Aye I do."

"Fine, then I'll go. I will be waiting in the port near the North section. Tell your men to dock there and I will sort out everything on my side." I agreed stiffly. Despite the risks I couldn't turn down whatever it was he was offering, it wasn't in his nature to lie to me and more worryingly he admitted he was hurt.

"Good, then I will see you tomorrow morning. Take enough clothes for a week that gives you plenty of time and Arthur should remain out of the picture as well. One last request, when you get here don't talk to anyone and if you have to, use an English accent. Your independence caused a bit of a stir here and it's better that no one knows who you are." He told me, his voice every bit as serious as he intended it, "That and I know you love faking that accent to mock Arthur."

I couldn't help but chuckle at the last remark, it was moments like that when I really cherished his friendship. Despite how bad things are he always made me laugh but never left me in the dark. "Well, I guess I have to get ready then. I will see you tomorrow morning bright and early."

"Bye and have a safe trip."

"Slán," I replied and hung up, sighing to myself I started work on gathering some things to take with me.

_ End of Flashback _

Suddenly the door opened and I saw Alistair standing in the doorway. I gasped at seeing him, he was badly injured and leaning on a crutch. His right foot was in a cast and the majority of his exposed skin was covered in bandages. The only part I could see that remained bandage free was his face and head. He stood frozen for a minute before a soft smile fell on his face and he spoke, "For a minute there I didn't think ye'd come." He dropped his head and smiled at the ground as he spoke, "But now that ye'r here I guess I have to show why I called ye over."

He started limping towards me, leaning heavily on the crutch wincing slightly with every step. I rushed forward to help him but he brushed me off, claiming it wasn't my duty to help him and he was tough enough to handle a bit of walking. I stood back watching him carefully and bit my lip as he almost tripped at one point.

"Are ye coming or not?" he called without turning back to me. Nodding I followed him down a series of halls; I kept a careful eye on him afraid my friend would fall and hurt himself more. Thankfully he didn't and I breathed a sigh of relief once we got to our destination. He stopped in front of a door identical to all the other doors in the manor and pushed it open. Stepping inside I noticed the toys on the shelves and the rocking chair in the corner beside a French window. In the middle was a cot and in it my son. I froze, unable to move as I watched Alistair stand beside the cot grinning like the idiot he was. Heroic, selfless, fearless, bold and daring idiot. Without thinking I raced forward and scooped the baby into my arms and burst into tears as I cradled the boy in my arms. Clearing my eyes I looked down at him, he was exactly as I remembered him, the same chubby face, small hands and curly dark red hair that stuck up in angles like Arthurs did. It was then when I noticed something odd, his right eye was blue while the other remained grass green. I looked up at Alistair who had sat down on the rocking chair and was now watching us waiting for me to notice his eyes.

"Aye we don't know what happened, but his eye colour just changed a week after he came here. We took him to some specialist doctors but they couldn't find anything. They told us it was because he was so young and sometimes a babies eye colour can change. Personally I think it's because he was taken here and now his people are finding their own path." He told me in barely a whisper, his voice starting to give out.

"But, he's alright then?" I asked and bit back more tears that were threatening to fall.

He nodded slightly and relaxed onto the chair. "Aye he is, he cried non-stop for a week. He has some lungs on him, I can tell you that... Actually this is the first time I saw him smile as brightly."

I looked at the boy again and my heart melted at the sight of him reaching up to touch my face, a bright smile lighting up his face. "So he's ok here then?"

"Aye and if you would believe it Arthur has barely left his side. It seems like the boy won his heart, or maybe that's what happens when you have a wean," he trailed off and stared out the window.

I swallowed at the remorse I saw in his face but forced my attention back to the bundle in my arms. "Will ya calm down?" I asked the child as he started laughing and wiggling in my arms. I giggled at his happiness and blissful ignorance; slowly I moved to stand beside Alistair and gave him a bright smile, "No point in dwelling on that now. How about we take Colin out for a walk? I know for a fact you won't let that crutch stop you."

Alistair turned to look up at me before returning my smile, "aye, his pram is over there," he pointed to the far corner and then unsteadily stood up. "We might need to walk slowly, but ye'r right and I need to get out of this stuffy house anyway."

During that walk I felt like I was in heaven, we laughed, reminisced and talked about Colin and my independence. Alistair had promised to help me see Colin as much as physically possible but warned about what would happen if Arthur were to find out. There was always a catch and with the overbearing risk of getting caught hanging over our heads, I decided to cherish what time I had with my son.

I often thought back to that week and remembered how perfect it really was; I had everything I wished for and none of the stress. I smiled at the joy on Colin's face when we introduced him to some of the locals and to the ducks at the pond. I was determined to make the most out of our time together and did everything I had planned to do and more. There were times when Colin was difficult but they made me even more determined to prove to myself more than anyone else that I was a good mother. Pangs of regret came back during these times but were quickly washed away once I saw his smiling face or Alistair gave me an encouraging smile. It was on one of these days that we took him to the beach and couldn't help but talk about the time we took a certain young blonde to another beach. If I could go back in time to relive one day it would be that one. By then Alistair had recovered quite a bit so we wasted no time relaxing and sunbathing. Colin loved the water and tried to crawl towards it everytime we put him down on the sand. I helped him build his first sandcastle and then had to defend it from Alistair. He knocked it down in the end but watching us made Colin burst into fits of laughter and made his face shine brighter than any star in the sky.

The end of the week came too soon and word of Alistair returning to war now his injuries had healed reached us. It was sad handing over Colin again, but this time I knew he was going to be loved and a lot of my worries had been put to rest. With a hug and kiss to his forehead I gave him to Alistair and left for Dublin. This time I didn't try and hold my tears and just let them fall freely. Alistair reached forward and pulled me into a hug, swearing that he will always be there for me and will defend Colin to his dying breath. I tried to smile but found I couldn't, instead I just hugged them both closer and buried my head in Alistair's shoulder. When I eventually pulled away I noticed the car in the driveway and made my way to it. Getting in I took another glance over the manor. It had a beautiful Victorian design and thought aloud how perfect it was for Colin to be raised there. As I left I felt my heart break again, this time it didn't hurt as much but another pain lingered. A new type of loss, one I never thought I would feel again. One of being cut off from a friend possibly for a long way into the foreseeable future.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slán = Bye in Irish
> 
> wean = kid in Scottish slang (used in some parts of Ireland too ^^)


End file.
